Counting Down to #1
#5 Don't be a Debbie Downer
Try to be happy and upbeat. Guys don't want to be with complainers. Things not to write: "My ex was a jerk, and I'm hoping you're not." OR "Looking to avoid players and commitment phobes." OR "I won't put up with a man's crap."
#4 Don't Try Too Hard
Guys can tell when you try too hard, and it appears desperate. Better to be the cool and confident girl. So, don't write things like: "Your mother and kids will love me." OR "I'm the best cook in town, even my ex says that."
Avoid trying too hard in other ways. For example, don't brag about your net worth or fabulous job.
# 3 Be Mysterious
Your profile should be short and sweet. Don't lie, but when it comes to personal details, leave them out. A guy should get to know you slowly. It's also more intriguing to men if you are more mysterious. Always leave him wanting more.
Don't post a gallery of 10 photos, of you and all your friends, your family, your pets, you at your job, you getting a manicure, you in your convertible. You will kill the mystery.
Same goes for the text in your profile. Keep it short, just enough so a man knows enough about you to write an opening email/text. Write about your hobbies and interests, and favorite restaurants. You can include dealbreakers, like religion or whether you have or want children. But beyond that, there's no need to write a book.
#2 Keep it Classy: No Risqué Photos or Text
Don't put anything sexual out there, either in your profile photos or your profile text. If you do, you may attract the wrong men, ones looking for hookups.
If you're looking for a hook-up, then by all means, be risqué. But I know many women are looking for a good guy who leads to a long-term boyfriend/husband.
#1. PHOTOS ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT THING
Make sure you have beautiful photos that show the real you.
Look hot, but in a classy way. Don't post risqué photos, as just discussed.
Wear makeup, and you can even use Photoshop a little bit (like to get rid of a pimple), but don't Photoshop to the point where a man won't recognize you when he meets you.
Dress in your photos like you would dress to a fancy occasion, not how you look on the way to the gym in the morning, before you've had your coffee.
If you can, have professional photos taken, and get a make-over by a professional makeup artist beforehand. If you can't afford a professional photographer, have a friend take a good photo of you or take a good selfie.
Make sure the photos aren't more than a few years old. Many men complain to me that women post very old photos from when they were younger and thinner.
Also, smile in your photos - men tell me they will pass over a sourpuss.
Controlling your mind will help keep you in control of your life.
Henry Ford was one of many successful people who knew this: "If you think you can do a thing, or you think you can't do a thing, you're right."
What does this have to do with dating?
If you think you will never have luck online dating, you won't.
If you think you will always be with abusive men or players, you will.
If you think you will find Mr. Right, you will!
This is why I have included a spiritual element to my dating book. While my book delves into dating tips and strategies, and has advice on grooming and much more, there is also a section on confidence and on keeping your mind strong and healthy.
Over the years I've seen too many women get discouraged and give up on dating. It doesn't have to be this way, which is why I wrote a section in my book called Spiritual Gym, which explains how to keep your mind strong throughout your dating travails and triumphs.
For a copy of A Woman's Guide to Understanding Men: Dating Secrets Most Women Don't Know click here.
PRAISE FOR THE BOOK:
"If you want to know what men really want and to mesmerize Mr. Right, buy this book now! A Woman's Guide to Understanding Men will take you into the inner workings of the male mind so you get fabulous results!" - Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, authors of the New York Times bestseller The Rules
Letting the man take the lead in a relationship is hard for some modern women who are used to being aggressive in their careers and in every other way.
One thing you need to understand is that letting the man take the lead doesn't mean you're a doormat, nor does it mean you're passive.
You're easy to be with but you stand up for yourself if something is off. You work on your inner game and your outer game.
Work out. Get blowouts, manicures, pedicures, wax your eyebrows and everywhere else that needs it. Get lash extensions. Stay up on the latest fashions, and always look your absolute best.
Take massive actions to meet men - online dating, singles related events, fix-ups, and other ways.
Courtship is definitely not passive. It's about learning to receive from a man, seeing what he's capable of giving you. You keep your eyes open during the courtship process and evaluate his qualities to see if he's someone you can have a future with.
If you believe in courtship, you're smart because you understand how well it works. Don't let anyone try to convince you otherwise.
I give smart successful women tools to weed out time-wasters and teach them how to find their Mr. Rights.